All the previous posts, six of them, have dealt with the Zeiss lenses I’ve used during this year. I have no gear related subjects determined by, for example, my supporters, but for the sake of this project it was a kind of mandatory to answer the questions I myself proposed at the beginning of this project (to be more precise I promised to share my experiences related to these particular Zeiss lenses and hoped it would be useful to you). But now that I’ve done it and the year is slowly approaching to its end, it’s time to write about something else: the edge of the wave.
I have, of course, shot a lot more than what I have actually shared through this project. I regret that I forgot to check my shutter count before I started this project, but my careful estimation is about 30 000 – 50 000 pictures during this year. I know it might sound a lot, but there are a lot of duplicates as I’m always trying to get a best shot of each particular scenario – for example, Aura swinging in the swing at the summer (see blog post here) took approximately 500-700 shots alone with rapid fire (and multiple days) as I wanted just a right background, angle, etc. Some of the pictures I’ve shot could have been fitted in to this project but having no time to write a proper blog post has sometimes prevent me to share them. Then there are other pictures, like family photography, that is too personal to be interesting to others. But the bottom line is this: I have had a great opportunity to shoot with some of the best gear in the industry and I’ve tried to make best out of it by continuously searching photographic opportunities and ideas throughout the year.
People say that the older you get the faster the years go by. When you are young those childhood summers feel endless, but then at the age of forty you pass 5 or 10 years just like that in one step without knowing where the years went. It happens to all of us. We all get sucked into work, tasks, deadlines and routines which make it difficult to stay there at the edge of the wave where you feel life in all its uniqueness. Every time I realize this I get into this existential mode and it feels like I’m unveiling the unpleasant truth everyone is trying to deny by concentrating on ‘most important matters’ – I realize that I’m not really experiencing the moments, I’m just watching the film go by.
But for me the camera has always been a tool which I have been using to swim against current of time, to collect all those small moments and trying to be there at the edge of wave even then when the wind is raising up. Camera obscura is really miracle of physics which one can use to create projections on a flat surface, to capture light and shadows of life itself and to able to view them later on like we would actually be there. If you have examined old photographs you certainly know that existential feeling when you see people who have already passed away looking directly to your eyes through the frame. You still exists in this world and are able to experience all this, they don’t. This is the feeling when you are at edge of the wave – the feeling of being alive.
What I really love in a yearlong project like this is that it forces me to be active throughout the year. I need to fill in those blog slots with pictures and writings, but at the same time, I’m there collecting moments and creating memories. It forces the time slow down and helps me to experience real life that gets buried under daily routines and tasks. With the camera I'm able to suspend the mundane life and see it in another context where there is great beauty in it as well. Little vanishing moments and marks left by the light of life are captured into frames which constantly remind me that 'this really happened and I was there to witness it'.
As the year is coming to its end very soon I’m sharing some moments along the year. Mostly family stuff as it is, in the end, the most important photographic work for me. Nothing special in the world of photography, but for me, small moments full of life.